i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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