Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
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