Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.