I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
