At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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