He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
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