YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Randomize
