So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
