That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
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