And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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