I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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