Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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