You're so nebulous sometimes
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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