It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
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