Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
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