yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
