so explain again why im purple
no
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
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There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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