shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Randomize