I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Randomize