Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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