Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
