I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
