Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I currently don't understand fingers.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize