my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Randomize