i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize