Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
im holly from the hills drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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