just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize