Come see our sink grown plant.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
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