no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
