tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
