I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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