We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
