Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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