You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
