we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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