doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize