dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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