i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
what is it with giant penises always finding me
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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