Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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