our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
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She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
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He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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