Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
