loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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