): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
