Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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