Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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