If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize