I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
