Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Randomize
