is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
