are you still at the devil's house?
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
