You're a womanizer and a bitch.
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how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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