Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Boobs speak an international language.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
