Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
